Say cheese!

Since I was ranting in my previous post about profile pictures I figured I owed it to you to elaborate.  For those of you who have already dabbled in the online dating scene, you know exactly what I’m talking about.  For those of you online dating virgins, you are in for a treat!

The “illusionist” !  Sometimes their profile picture looks kinda cute and you’re thinking….alright…here is some potential.  Then you scroll through the rest of the pictures and it’s bad news! Always make sure you scroll through all pictures ladies!  A lot of guys will also take the brilliant approach to post photo after photo without a face shot, very distant or blurry.  For example: a ski shot, a wakeboard shot, a rock climbing shot, an underwater scuba shot, random web images, etc…can you visualize it?  I’m sorry but if you don’t have a close up face shot what’s the point?  Let’s be frank,  I want to see what you look like…am I going to want to kiss you?  It may sound shallow, but I call it how I see it…initially it’s a physical attraction from the photo…then you read on to see if you connect on a level other than physical.

The “Where’s Waldo”!  This is a very common profile problem.   You really have no idea which guy is the eligible bachelor because all of his pictures are group pictures with about 10 other guys(usually doing keg stands, dirt biking, mud wrestling, etc…).  And I hate to say it, but all to often it’s the unattractive man taking this approach which is silly.  I get all excited because there are hot guys in the photo, only to find out it’s the one homely guy in the photo…ugh!  I kinda want to say, “yeah you look nice guy but …are your hot friends single?”

The “Poser”!  This approach just kills me.  These guys pose with young children.  There is always a disclaimer as you read their profile “the kid isn’t  mine…just a friends kid, my niece, my neighbors kid, a strange child from he park-haha”.  As if seeing a man with a child is a turn on? All I can say is if that was my kid plastered on an online dating site as bait, I’d be pissed!

The “Narcissist”! These guys are hilarious.  Picture after picture of bathroom shirtless selfies, gym selfies, shirtless laying in bed selfies,etc…I know that texting, social media, and selfies are the norm these days but geesh! When I’m at the gym I can’t imagine posing in front of the mirrors and taking selfies…aren’t they there to work out? The funny thing is a lot of these guys have bodies that are not hot!  I mean if you are going to put it out there like that…it should be lean and mean…just sayin!

The “Rambo”!  I have to say though I think my favorite(I’m being SUPER sarcastic)profile is the bachelor posing with his big guns next to a dead animal.  Photo after photo of guns, dead animals, camo, knives, etc.  I mean come on, this is a dating site…not an entry into your hunting magazine for “shot of the month”!!! I don’t know about you, but seeing a man with big guns next to dead animals kinda gives me the creeps…not really a turn on.  Instead of ending up in his bed at the end of the date you might find yourself bound on the roof of his truck-yikes!

Are these men really that clueless as to what women want and find attractive?


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